30th April - 2nd May

On the way home Lel told me that Ruth had been very negative, had cut off a lot of dead skin and that she did not give any possible positives about how his wound could possibly heal.

I have been told from the beginning that I need to avoid as much stress as possible however it would seem that Harry doesn't seem to want to comply with this. For the first time I was having bad problems on a daily basis with nausea and was taking antiemetics 3 times a day before each meal.

As we got back neither of us were overly hungry so we had a quiet night.

On the morning of the Sunday the 30th we were up early as usual so as to stop Harry getting too excited. Being a bank holiday weekend we just decided to stay at home given that the rest of the world were bound to be going out and about for the weekend. We kept both dogs quiet for the weekend, much to Jade's disgust. Julie was at work so I asked Helen whether she would be able to pop over and give us a hand with Harry for the afternoon re-dress. She came over and wasn't shocked with what she saw but sadly, when he had had all the tape stuck on the previous day, they had taped over a really nice clean dry bit of stitching that had healed. This then looked a bit wet and sore when we got the tape off which was frustrating. He was very good but it clearly hurt him as they had used very sticky tape.

Lel and Helen redressed it whilst I posted cheese triangles into the front end and kept him still. Helen didn't seem too phased by it all and said she had seen far worse wounds heal which was very reassuring.

Monday the 1st we stayed in again apart from a brief foray to the shops for the weekly food. Vicky came over to sit with him as leaving him in Tena pants only would have been a bit risky. In the evenings we were putting him in his pants as well as a t-shirt in between another pair of pants to try and stop him getting to the wound. He was also wearing a 'lampshade' cone to try and put him off having a chew of it overnight. Helen came over again to help with the re-dress and was quite happy with how it was looking even though it was clearly a very large wound.

On Tuesday the 2nd I took annual leave to get Harry back to the vets, dad came over and took me to oxygen, leaving mum at home with the dogs. We headed back home afterwards and collected Harry alone to take him to the vets again. We got through there in plenty of time and popped in for the bathroom, I asked that Charlotte call us when they were ready for us so we waited in the car. At around 1.35 we were called and headed in. Brendan was waiting for us in reception and took us through to the nurses room where Harry was taken off into the back for a re-dress and laser treatment.

As Brendan came back through to talk to us, I explained how Lel had felt after speaking with Ruth and asked if we could book an appointment as the weekend so she could see him and talk through her anxieties with him. He wasn't working the weekend but offered to call that evening and speak with her. He explained that he was hoping he would be able to operate on Friday if the wound had granulated enough and bring some of the skin over to reduce the size of the wound. Brendan seemed very positive that he could work with the wound and that we would be fully able to have his bum healed in time. He stated that it wasn't going to happen fast but that he has healed larger wounds in the past and he didn't see any reason why this wouldn't work also. I asked if they had the pet medical suit that they had ordered initially as it might make him feel more secure with his dressings and might make me feel easier about leaving him...

We headed home having booked a further appointment on Friday in case he would be healed enough for surgery. We still had the appointment on Thursday that we had booked so we had chance for Brendan to check how it was and hopefully make the ok for further reparative surgery.

Having got home I had a phone call from my boss telling me that I had to go onto a change of contract and go to flexible working as apparently the longest any phased return can be is 6 weeks and I have had significantly longer than this. She explained it badly saying that it would be that I would be paid when I was in which almost indicated that I would be on a zero hours contract which is clearly not what I signed up for..

That evening whilst sat at home I felt that I had a midge bite coming up on my hand. I was surprised as I didn't think that I had been bitten by anything. I also felt that my legs were a bit itchy, I looked at my legs and they were covered in a rash which felt and looked like midge bites all over my hips, knees, legs and all the way down them. I decided to phone the Chemo line as whilst I know it is a possible side effect, all the literature said to phone for advice if this happened. I was on hold for ages so we decided to take the dogs out for a walk and whilst out they answered the phone. They advised me to take piriton - fortunately I had loads of this having been provided with a bottle when Harry's tumour flared up and to call back in the morning if it hadn't gone down or if it had got any worse. The nurse said that she would speak to a doctor and get back to me. As we got back my phone rang, Lel accidentally cancelled it and it was Brendan.. We rang the surgery back but obviously with the time of night, it was closed. We were putting the dogs to bed when her phone rang, Brendan had called mum and dad to get her number and called back in order to speak to her. I love my vet so much!!!

He spent about 15 minutes on the phone to her explaining what his plans were for Harry's reconstruction and telling her that he can mend this and, unlike how Ruth was implying, Harry will heal and is not going to be put to sleep over this.  She felt so much more relaxed after the phone call which was good for me but I know that I had been stressed and far more tense than is good for me. On going to bed my legs, hips and arms were covered with a rash that looked like midge bites and itched like mad. I took a piriton as advised and my regular evening medication and waited for the nurse to call back. Around 10pm she phoned, little did I know that she had phoned mum and dads first, not quite sure why as I had told her to phone back on my mobile - poor mum must have wondered what on earth was going on that evening. First Brendan then the chemo nurse!!

The nurse advised again to use piriton and if it was no better or worse in the morning not to take my next dose.

27th April - 29th April

On Thursday the 27th we were due back at the vets today so dad came to collect me and both dogs. We were due there round 11.00 and arrived early as normal. I popped in to use the loo and as I cam out Brendan had finished with his last client and spoke to me. As I got back to the car, Brendan and Hazel came out and asked if we wanted to go in early. We lifted him out of the car and walked him in. He was at this point wearing dressings and a pair of ladies 'Tena' type pants to keep all the dressings in, and his nose out of it! They suggested that we take a wander and get a coffee as it was going to be a fair while before he was ready as he was having laser treatment as well as a full re-dress. We popped next door and got a subway before walking over to Sainsbury's and getting a few bits. We headed back to the vets and I sat chatting to Billie (nurse) whilst dad went to sleep and Brendan and Hazel finished off with Harry. When they finished, Brendan called us back in and I asked about Harry's left which was still swollen. He said that he was happy that it would settle and was just swelling from the surgery. He put a lighter dressing on Harry's wound saying that we could now start to change it on alternate days as it was looking very good. We got home in decent time and I spent the rest of the day keeping an eye on him so that he didn't do anything too exciting!!

On the Friday it was quite nice as we didn't have to change his dressings, this gave us chance to relax a little more and just have a quiet day. Brendan had suggested that we massage Harry's leg to try and get the swelling to go down, however it seemed to be going down of it's own accord by this point.

On Saturday the 29th at around 2pm Julie came up to re-dress it. As she took the dressing off, her reaction of 'oh shit' was rather worrying. I couldn't look at it but both her and Lel had a look also. Lel took a photo and we emailed it straight to the vets. Julie suggested that we go straight over to the vets as it appeared that the stitches had split further and some of the skin graft had not taken and was dying.

We bundled both dogs into the car and headed off to the vets. The afternoon surgery didn't open until 3pm and as I was phoning it wasn't going through to reception. At half past 2 as we were well on the way I managed to get through to Hazel who was on reception. I told her that we were on our way over and may have sounded a bit panicky and told her that we had emailed the picture through. She opened it up and agreed that we were doing the right thing in going through but not to panic and they would have someone see us as soon as we got there.

We arrived at the vets soon after 3 and were put straight into one of the rooms, Hazel popped in to have a look at it and agreed that he needed the vet and she couldn't do anything until the vet came through. Ruth came in to have a look at him, I stayed in for a few minutes but was struggling with chemo nausea and told her this. She suggested that I leave the room so went to wait in reception for a while leaving Lel in there with one of the nurses. Charlotte opened the email and the picture of Harry's wound popped up there. I struggled not to throw up, it was a real mess. After around an hour Charlotte, one of the nurses popped in to see how they were getting on. By this stage he was fully dressed and his wound covered with lots of dressings and tape. They checked that we had enough meds for him for the week, Ruth decided that she wanted us to have another appointment with Brendan on the Tuesday (bank holiday weekend again) in addition to the appointment we had on the Thursday, we paid and left.

24th April - 26th April

With Harry only having been released from the vets on the Sunday and in such a bad way, they suggested that it would be a good idea if I could have the week off to be at home with him to make sure that he was ok. This meant that I was sat in constantly looking at him and making sure that he didn't get too excited. His leg remained swollen and I sent a couple of pictures over to the vets as I was a little concerned about it. On Monday night we had to change his dressing which I stayed well away from. Lel bless her got an eyeful of it but our lovely neighbour Emma came to help. I posted cheese in the front end which kept him quiet nicely.

On Tuesday I was still at home for the whole day, in the evening we were both at the hygienist which as always was a total delight. I was happy to pop out for half an hour and leave him however we asked our neighbours to pop over and sit for an hour which they were lovely and happy to do. As we put him out his dressing has come off and I panicked, I knew that we had 2 neighbours on the street who are either nurses or ambulance techs so shot out into the street as Julie, the ambulance tech was arriving home. As we changed his dressings with her help there was a large gap where he had split his stitches through wagging too much but we were hopeful that it was starting to heal a little.

Wednesday was Chemo day and Vicky came over to work from home (our house) for the day. We set off round 7.30 as usual and got to Christies just after 8 am. I took my ticket for the blood room and sat and waited.. and waited.. and waited.. The blood room is normally really quick however we waited best part of 45 minutes to get through then sat for a few minutes to see Dr T. My appointment was 9.30 and at 9.20 we were taken through to her room to wait for her. I was really surprised as she is usually late so it was nice to be seen on time for a change. She came in and asked how I was, how I had been coping and whether I had had any side effects from it. I told her about forgetting to take my antiemetics and what had happened and that the only main issue I had had was the peripheral neuropathy which seemed very minimal given what I was taking. My bloods still hadn't come through so she suggested that we head over to the Maggie's centre and they would call us when they were back. I left my phone number with one of the nurses and we headed over there. It was the 1st birthday of Maggie's so there were lots more people around than usual. We went into the garden room and sat to relax in peace and quiet for a bit before heading into the main part of Maggie's. We had only been sat for around half an hour when people moved to the window looking excited. I was thinking it would be someone for the birthday but then word went round that Christies was on fire. I would just like a nice quiet treatment day where everything runs on time and to plan.. Really don't think that is too much to ask is it??!! We looked out and saw a black wall of smoke coming up from the direction of the hospital. Around half 11 we headed out for a walk to see if there was anywhere that we could buy a sandwich, the shop only had chicken tikka type things which clearly was no use at all to either of us. With nothing there and the shocking smell and taste of smoke in the air we headed back to Maggie's for a while. Iona posted a link to Facebook from Manchester Evening News and in it it said that treatments were still going on as planned.

I phoned Oak Road Treatment Centre to see if my bloods were back through yet, they weren't sure but suggested that I head over and they would see what they could do. We went towards the hospital and were told we couldn't get to the treatment centre so we negotiated a route to get us in there. I again asked whether my bloods were through and one of the volunteers said she would try and find out. I decided we would head through to Ward 42 where I see Dr T to see if they were back. As we got into main reception I looked at my phone to see a missed call from a with-held number and swore as I knew it would be someone calling me about my bloods. We saw one of the nurses I had given my number to earlier and asked if my bloods were back, he confirmed that they had just come through and there had been a slight delay due to the fire but that they were all fine so we could head through for treatment.

We went upstairs from treatment and I asked for the heat pack to raise a good vein. This was provided and I sat with it on for a while. The nurse came back and tried a vein to the left of my usual one, it hit a valve. The pain from it was ridiculous and I had to ask for her to stop. The nurse went back in to the vein that we have used the previous twice and it wasn't happy any more but still took the canular. I was squeezing Lel's hand and was trying not to break her knuckles!! The nurse put the flush through and whilst we were sat there with the vincristine running through a member of staff came round offering soup and sandwiches. I said yes to both and had a lovely mug of tomato and red pepper soup and an egg mayo sandwich which we shared. The second flush went through as did my antiemetic and by 3pm we were done and all my meds handed over to me for the next 10 days. We went home and Vicky and Jade were sat together on the floor, Harry was curled up on a bed quietly and by the sounds of it, they had all had a lovely day together. Julie from 2 doors down who is an Emergency Medical Technician came up to help with the dressings again as I couldn't do it and it felt good to have someone medically trained being able to help us!

That evening I decided to split my chemo doses, to take the antiemetic then take the lombustine, to take another antiemetic then take my procarbazine then have a small dinner. I took another antiemetic then we headed to bed. All good and a good sleep with no issues unlike last time!! Seems I have this nailed. Amazing how you can learn from vomiting blood how not to do it again! As dad said, do it once, it's a mistake - do it twice, you're a fool!!

21st April - 24th April

On Friday the 21st, at 6.30 mum and dad came to collect us to get us to the vets for 8.40 check in. I knew we would be early however if we set off later then we would be too late and miss our slot with the vet. We got there round 8 so sat outside for a while and both of them went to sleep!! We headed in round 8.35, leaving Jade in the car and taking Harry in alone. As always with any surgery, Brendan talked me through what was going to be done, what the risks were and I reminded them to clean his teeth whilst he was under sedation. He said that they should be done round 2pm or so. At 2.30 having not heard anything I phoned to see how they were getting on. The nurse told me that Brendan was still 'working on the mass' but that his chest x-ray and blood work came back clear and that they were happy that it was just this one tumour.

At around half 4 Brendan called to say that he had finished and the nurses were cleaning Harry up in recovery but that the operation had been much bigger than expected. He suggested that we head over around 7.30 to collect him after they had finished for the day. I asked one of the vets if it had been a big job and she said it had and it was a bit of a mess, I ended up a bit upset and crying so they got me some tissues and offered me a cup of tea (funny how when someone is crying that's what we do!!!). Around 7.40, Brendan carried Harry though to the room.  He was still totally out of it and wearing a large pressure bandage around his back end over the dressings. With him being as he was, I said to Brendan that I would prefer him to stay in overnight and he totally agreed with me on this and said that he had been going to suggest it. We arranged to come over on the Saturday to see him and hopefully collect him but this was very much fluid depending on how he was. 

On Saturday the 22nd we went to collect a greyhound to re-home on behalf of the charity that we help out with, and took him to his new mum. As we were driving too and fro I phoned to see how he had been and spoke with Brendan who said that he had had a quiet night, had gone out for a wee in the morning and had ended up fainting due to the lactate build up in his muscles (either that or he looked at his bum!!). As he came round, one of the practice cats, Eric was headbutting his head gently!! He must have thought that he was seeing things! Brendan advised us to head over for round 2.30 so we could have some time with him as they were going to keep him again overnight. We finished with the re-home around 12 and headed over to the airport cafe so we were near the vets and could have some lunch before we went to see him at 2.30. I could feel I was getting anxious as I was nervous as to how he would be. I was trying to hold it in and not show Lel but I didn't manage too well and ended up mopping up my tears a little before we went in. I heard them walking him steadily down to the room where they had put the pad down for him to lay on. As we walked in, he was standing on the pad and was shaking. He was having what Brendan called a big case of 'the jitters' and turning his front feet in as though he didn't know what to do with himself. He had a drip line in and I think couldn't work out how to lay down. Brendan took hold of him very gently and lay him on his side. He was still rather tired and a bit out of it. Charlotte, one of the nurses brought a bowl of water in for him and Brendan asked what his favourite food is. Harry drank the water, I topped it up so he had about one and a half bowls of water whilst we were with him. Brendan was laughing at him and saying that the nurses have offered him water every half our and he has refused it so it's as though he's been showing them up! They brought some cubes in for him to try which he turned his nose up at, (not surprised, he's fussy at the best of time!) Charlotte asked if there was anything else he might eat, we said he might go for a venison tin, which again, he turned his nose up at for us. He clearly was still not feeling well. We sat with him til round 3.45 or so in the consulting room where the window was open. They said we could stay as long as we wanted and at the point of us saying we were leaving, they said they would leave him there asleep in the sun as he was happy and chilled out and they didn't need the room. Bless him. Brendan suggested that we try and get some pants for Harry to keep his dressings in place so we headed to Tesco as we got back to Skipton and bought a variety of pants including women's sanitary pants which are good and stretchy around the waist and hopefully will hold the dressings in place!

On Sunday 23rd, as I woke up, there was a message on my phone from Charlotte from the previous night saying that he had eaten half a tin on food before he went to bed. This simple thing made Lel and I feel so much more happier. Around 8.30 she sent a video of him walking around the garden doing a wee with no problems. This made us both feel so much better about collecting him at 11am. On getting over there we waited a couple of minutes whilst they brought him through to the nurses room. As we went through he was standing on a mat with a blanket covering it, his compression bandage was off and he wagged as we got in. We went through all his medication, they put some of the sanitary pants on him and cut a tail hole for him. We sat with him for a while before Brendan came through to talk us through everything. After going through all of this, we took him out to the car where Brendan picked him up and put him in the back for us. I sat in with him whilst Lel went back in and paid then we headed home. On the way back I realised that I hadn't booked his follow up to have his drains out. By this stage, the vets was closed so I set an alarm to remind me to phone the following day!

On getting him home we took his pants off and let him out for a wee. He did a big wee, we put his pants back on and he lay down and rest for the rest of the day. We took him for a short walk round the block at bed time, he did a wee and a poo so we figured he would have a quiet night. After a couple of noises that indicated he may be in a little pain, I gave him a painkiller as we had been told we could.

He had a quiet night as did Jade, although she had the runs so this morning we were cleaning poop up. He has a slightly swollen leg but other than that all seems good today and we have another appointment for Thursday at 11am.

I've just phoned the Drs and apparently my bloods are fine so I'm heading down now to collect them, hopefully fine means that my WBC and neutrophils are where they should be. I'll update when I get back...

So, my WBC was at 4.2 and neutrophils at 3.2 so well within guidelines and hopefully good for treatment on Wednesday.

14th April - 20th April

The 14th of April, being Good Friday was the start of the Easter break together. Since working here I have never had the 4 days off over Easter as I always would go for the cash and additional holiday day as opposed to having the time and being with Lel. Apart from the fact that they won't pay me for working a bank holiday as duty as I'm not fully up to speed for a full shift, I am now more looking to having the time with Lel as this is what really matters, not money nor extra holidays as she only has 15 days left this year with having taken my chemo dates off. We didn't do anything, just chilled out and had a lovely take out curry that night.

On the 15th, we went to see Brendan again about the lump on Harry's bum that first appeared at the end of February when we were in London and Bristol. This was the 3rd time he had been about it. We had already agreed to meet mum and dad there and go for a brew afterwards at the airport or something along those lines. As Brendan felt the lump and moved it around, we both noticed his face fall. He spent a fair while feeling it before sitting on the table opposite us and telling us that it is a Mastocytoma that reacts to histamine hence why it flares up and goes down as fast as it does and that he wanted to take it out as soon as possible given how big it was getting. He explained that the risks with these such tumours are that parts break off and invade other organs of the body therefore he wanted to get it out as soon as possible in the hope that it was still localised. He explained that chemotherapy may be needed however the chemo that targets this is very directive and literally does not affect any other organs or cause any other side effects or symptoms. I asked Brendan if he would use this on his own dog and he said he would so I felt reassured by this. In the meantime, we were given histamine spray, piriton and corpet to help his immune system and hope that we wouldn't have a flare up again before surgery. 

Before leaving, we booked to be back for it removing on the 24th of April. As Brendan was telling us all this, I could see Lel struggling again. We got them both outside, put them in the car and I held Lel as she sobbed. I felt so sorry for her as she has had so much stuff to deal with since last August and she doesn't need someone else that she loves to be dealing with cancer. She told me to go and tell mum and dad so I walked over and told them, as I did I started to cry as I really didn't want him to have to go through surgery and everything, poor pup. He really is my baby and the thought of him going through that really got to me as I explained what Brendan had said to mum. I told her we still needed to go for a walk and could they lead us up to the Tarn so we could walk and talk things through. As we got out of the car at the Tarn dad gave me a massive hug and I just said 'why?' I know there is no why but my poor little pup, my poor Bobo. So, we walked round the Tarn and talked and after this headed up to the airport cafe for a brew as we had set off very early and not eaten breakfast or had anything. After a chat, toast and a brew we headed off back home. We had intended to clean that afternoon but strangely enough, our hearts weren't in it so just did a bit of shopping then relaxed with the dogs. On the Saturday we cleaned, I can't remember what we did on the Sunday but the Monday we headed out to try and distract ourselves a little.

Back at work on the Tuesday after having a blood test at 8.20 and hoping that on this occasion the results don't get lost. I was covering duty for the shift so it was nice going in and knowing what the plan would be, the same on the Wednesday too therefore I had booked to go to oxygen that evening at 7pm as there was no way I would make it during the day. Lel was looking forwards to taking me there so that she could see what goes on and where I go. On Wednesday night after work I was shattered and having got home we ate dinner, watched TV for a bit then went to bed.

The following morning, Thursday, as I got up I looked at my calendar on my phone and realised that I had missed the oxygen session and felt awful. It set me up the wrong way for the day and I was really annoyed with forgetting about it. Work was ok, it felt to take forever though but I had sorted out being off on the Friday to get Harry to the vets which I was very glad about. That evening David, our mortgage advisor came round to discuss our options on mortgage renewal, really shows that life goes on regardless of everything else that is happening!!

25th March - 13th April

On the 27th of March I was back in work for the day but still feeling a little delicate. I spent the day doing my APR to justify why, even though I have been off, I am still worth my pay grade and recognition of the work that I have done both before going off and since returning. I was mainly left alone apart from people checking that I was ok which was nice and allowed me to get the work done.

On the 28th I was back at the doctors for another sick note, meeting my new GP who felt a bit waffy, especially when I asked for a vitamin D test on my bloods and she said 'is that the one you get from sunshine?' This left me feeling less than reassured. She agreed to another return to work note for a month of 5hours a day for 4 days a week as I had only managed 2 weeks in out of the last month due to being ill and having chemo leave. She also agreed for me to have another blood test before my next chemo so I knew where my bloods were up to and would know that I was healthy enough for it. I had oxygen straight after this so headed straight over.

On Friday the 31st we both had our first dental appointment in over 2 years which fortunately went well, apart from a trip to the hygienist being required, all else was fine. We headed home for the weekend, this being the first time we had been back since Christmas as I had been nervous of travelling since having started Chemo. On the way back we went out for lunch, delayed from dad's birthday 2 weeks previously. We had a nice weekend at home with a lovely lunch at the Spread Eagle at Sawley before heading back over to Salford. Lel, having got her motorway 'legs' found the drive easy and it made it so so much more straightforwards getting home and back.

We had a quiet week, work and home as usual with nothing much doing in between.  On the 3rd, I ended up covering duty pretty much single handedly for the whole of my shift which was ok but a little stressful by the time the late team came in. It was meant to be 2 TMs on with me however they both disappeared off the shop floor leaving me to cover advice, CC advice and reviewing. Whilst by the end of shift I was shattered, it was actually really good for me as it showed me that I still have the capacity to do my job properly and to the same standard that I did before this all started.

The following week, commencing the 10th, I had a couple of appointments. On the 11th I had a Skype appointment with Liz although my Skype knowledge bring limited, I phoned instead and had a half hour chat with her. Again, she said how well I was doing and how she feels I am coping with work and my health in a way that is conducive to my health and well-being.

On the 12th both Lel and I headed over to Christies to see Dr T for our chat. As we got there they were going to send me for bloods however I told them that I was just there to see her for an update, not for Chemo so asked that they would check with her that I didn't need them that day. They confirmed this and we sat and waited for her to be ready for me. Around 20 minutes late we were called though. Soon after she came into the consult room and we asked what 'some response to treatment' meant. She told us that whilst there had been a small amount of shrinkage, they hadn't measured this but what they were happier with was that the signal characteristics of the tumour had improved. Again, I wasn't totally sure what she meant but she seemed pleased by it and I figured it meant possibly that the remaining tumour is appearing less aggressive with the contrast dye. 

On the 13th I had my APR with my boss who agreed that I am doing well and whilst, didn't award me a 4 - the top mark of 2% pay rise, did award me a 3 giving me a 1.5% pay award and also said that she thinks I am one of the strongest and most positive people she has ever me met (including her sister who had cancer and died some years ago) so that was an amazing compliment. She also acknowledged how hard I worked before I went off and since returning and how my dedication to being back is something to behold. She mentioned that HR are still pushing for me to be back, however she is totally supportive in me taking my time to get better and get back in fully.

18th March - 24th March

On the 18th, after having such low white blood counts we decided that I should take the following week off work and use up my remaining 2 annual leave days and take 3 days as sick leave. Having decided this, I felt a lot more reassured and went about booking appointments at the doctors to have my bloods re-taken.  We also emailed Dr T's assistant to ask for more information  regarding the results that I was given as the phrase 'there has been some response to treatment' didn't mean a huge amount to either of us and we both wanted to hear it from her that there had been some positive results. We had hoped that she would send us a quick email with an update on but received a response saying she was on holiday until the following week when they would get back to us.

The 19th of March, being dad's birthday I had hoped to meet them for lunch however was still feeling rather rough so after speaking with him, made the decision to not go and us do lunch on another occasion. He was concerned that I may end up ill with my bloods still being so low and being around people.

I managed to get in with the nurse on the 20th of March at 8am so walked down there with Lel as she went to work. I was quickly in and out, I am getting so used to having my bloods taken now and fortunately my veins are quite happy for this still! They told me the results would be in the following day.

On the 21st we received and email from Dr T's secretary offering us an appointment to see her to discuss the results on the 12th of April which felt to be an absolute age away but still would be a chance to talk it through. Having given blood on the Monday and been told they would be in on the Tuesday I decided to wait until Wednesday the 22nd to go and get them and decided to walk down to collect them mid afternoon. Its only 15 minutes walk and it was quite nice to get out of the house for a bit, even though I still felt rather weak and waffy from the previous week.

On getting to the doctors I was told that they had lost my results at the lab however they would take another blood sample whilst I was there and send that one off too to make sure that we had at least one up to date test. Mid afternoon I headed over to see Sue D. for my appointment, I felt fine and we talked through how I and getting on both physically and emotionally. She told me how well I am doing which is always nice to hear and makes me feel like I am dealing with the current situation well.

In the evening we had booked to go and see Sophie Sabbage at Maggie's which I was really excited about however I was very nervous also about how I may be around people. However, having spoken with Iona as well as Lel, I came to the decision that I would enjoy going out as I had been looking forwards to it, as Iona said, I could sit at the back and leave if I started to feel ill at all.

I phoned the doctors the following day and was told that my results were back in so headed down there again. At my request they had printed them off and were behind the counter for me. Strangely, the print off had both the results from the 20th and the 22nd on there!! So, on the 17th when I went to Salford Royal for the quick blood check my WBC had been 1.8 - should be between 4.0 & 11.0, my neutrophils had been 1.0 - should be between 1.8 & 7.5. On the 20th my WBC was 1.2 so it had dropped, and my neutrophils were down to 0.7! On the 22nd my WBC was up to 2.3 and my neutrophils were up to 1.1 so still both low but improving. I'm so glad that we had made the decision for me to take the rest of the week off work as clearly my immune system was very low and being around people at this time would not have been a good idea. We continued to take it steady, and had a quiet weekend.