On the Friday night we headed over to B&Q to get the tree, with Saturday being spent decorating it and getting the other Christmas decorations down. I was determined to make this Christmas fabulous having put Lel through so much this year. I really want it to be a good one.
Sunday (4th) was a busy day with Lucy’s children’s baptisms on the Wirral. I feel guilty with Lel having to drive all the time, especially when she doesn’t like it so much so we set off early, having to get to the church for 1015. We had an easy run over there, I took a bit of food for the day as I can’t expect anyone to cater for a dairy and gluten free vegetarian. Not that I’m fussy or anything!! On arrival at the church I had a good chat with Anne, Lucy’s mum (who has just been diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer) before Mass started. Lel was a god-mother for one of the children therefore had to sit at the front of the church. I was sat with Rick and the boys, I am never the most tolerant with children and without my Lel, I could have been happy to flatten all the children in the church however, when in God’s house, one has to behave so I grinned and bared it to get through. Following the ceremony we all went to the White Horse on Chester Race Course for a buffet. I had my 3 boiled eggs as the buffet was pizza, chips, caesar salad with chicken on, olives, pate, chicken wings etc. I had a small handful of chips and some olives so was happy that I had taken food. We chatted to Lel’s friends and stayed until around 4 when we set off home. Lel drove again, doing a fabulous job and getting us home safely. The dogs were flat the minute we got back, they always find travelling so exhausting!
The next week I was using taxis all week for treatments as all my lifts were sick! It made the week feel very expensive, bearing in mind that the treatment itself is £17 per session, although I did pay in advance for the whole lot (I knew I would forget to take it with me regularly)! On the Tuesday I had a bit of a melt down as I decided that the Christmas tree was wonky. At session earlier in the day someone had told me that I was bouncing off the ceiling and walls and seemed hyperactive and I had been feeling on top of the world. In the evening I then bottomed out when I decided that the tree wasn’t straight. I got really upset and ended up crying in the kitchen. Lel, bless her just wanted to get it right for me and was doing her best to make it right. She did wonders and got it pretty good, the tree ended up with a newspaper under it and a blanket wrapped around the base to the newspaper couldn’t be seen! It looks fabulous, she did such a good job. I think I had been a bit too bouncy and bottomed out a bit. I struggled to pick back up for the rest of the week however continued with oxygen treatment. I think that paying for the taxis left me feeling a bit annoyed all week as I had received a letter mid November telling me that I was now on half pay so was trying to save money and taxis felt an expense we could have done without.
On Saturday the 10th we were back over in Chester, seeing Lel’s dad and Pauline for lunch. They had taken great care to get somewhere with a vegan menu and I was struggling when getting dressed as to what I would wear as I didn’t want to have to wear a smart hat. I had a bit of a flap until Lel saw the Christmas jumpers and suggested that we wear those as this was our Christmas lunch with John and Pauline (they’re heading away for Christmas and New Year) and we won’t see them then until January. The food was lovely, the restaurant was a treat and as we left, Pauline gave me a Christmas present, she was so excited about it - it was an M&S coat (size 8), last time I checked, whilst I have lost around a stone, I haven’t shrunk to an 8 however it was in pristine condition, (I think Lel might be having it as a dog walking coat)! We were back home by 5:30 to do the dogs as we had left them for once. On Sunday I had thought that we would use the Vue card that mum and dad had bought us to go to the cinema, I thought there was about £30 on it. Upon arriving at the Lowry it was packed. We drove to the top of the car park, found it to be totally full then found a space on the way out. After the trauma of that we headed to Vue, where when trying to pay for the film on the card, we were told there was no money on there. I couldn’t work out how there was no money on it, I felt sure that there would be £30 so asked the manager to check the card for me. He came back saying that it had been used in 2014 for £20 (2 tickets) and in 2015 for £30. I was unsure what the £30 would have been and whilst I knew we had been to see something in 2015, couldn't work out how £30 would have gone when 2 tickets only cost £20. We got home and I got rather upset again, feeling rather low as I had been looking for something we could do for a free afternoon out. Again, I ended up in the kitchen, crying. I couldn’t sit still doing nothing so we ended up writing Christmas cards for the rest of the afternoon. Having had 2 meltdowns in one week I was a little worried that I was dipping in my mood however I have known since first diagnosis that I can’t be happy all the time. I wasn’t before it was located so why would I think I would be now?
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