February 11th - February 12th

Having had some amazing comments from people following me starting the blog - they are all so kind I have updated it so it is now fully up to date to this point. I know that it is really dull in places however it is how our life has been, and is still going on. We have brief flashes of drama (and trauma) in and amongst every day life. I have realised though how lucky I am, my tumour - apparently is incurable, to me this means that the NHS have not found a cure that they can patent as yet. It will apparently return however since I am planning on living until I’m 88 years old, then that’s fine, it can come back then. 

When I saw my MRI scans for the first time in Mr Leach’s office I felt sick due to the size of the tumour, however I have since realised how lucky I am from it. The tumour had pushed my brain over quite a way from where it should be, as well as pushing my skull upwards and thinning it. When I shaved my head for charity in 2010, the photos from then show that my skull was slightly higher on the right hand side, over my tumour!! This shows that it had been there for at least 6+ years as it couldn’t have pushed my skull up overnight. I therefore have a larger skull with more space in it so should the tumour come back, there is space for it!

I am very lucky, Grade 3 Oligodendrogliomas, whilst apparently ‘always’ coming back do not metastise to anywhere else in the body so should it decide to come back, it will come back in my brain only and into the gap left by the tumour that has been removed. It has also made me re-asses my priorities in life, last year I worked every bank holiday going in order to get the money, now I prefer to spend the time with Lel, family matter. Hold your loved ones that bit tighter and tell them how much you care for them. In a way, it has been the best thing that has ever happened to me, whilst I am less tolerant of ‘people’s shit’, it has shown me how much I love my family and how much love I have from people. 

I believe that whilst the NHS have told me it is incurable, to me, this simply means that they haven't found a cure for it that they can patent yet. Paraphrasing Sophie Sabbage - Every mountain is unclimbable until someone climbs it, every feat is impossible until someone completes it - also there is no cancer that has not been survived by someone somewhere in the world. I have so much hope and belief that I will beat this and in 20 years time I will show the NHS that Grade 3 Oligodendrogliomas do not ‘always’ come back.